threading my prayer rug by sabeeha rehman

I am their Baji Jan.Īnyone who was our parents’ age, we addressed them as auntie and uncle. When I protested and cried discrimination-why is the term ‘dear’ reserved only for boys-my grandmother instructed all my siblings and younger cousins to call me ‘ Baji Jan.’ To this day, that honorific endures. If he or she was a contemporary, it was Baji for girls and Bhai Jan (dear brother) for boys. It was considered rude to call any elder by their name. It was the culture of respect for the elder. So how did I know that she was older? If she was a grade ahead of me in school (or more). Even if she was just one year older than me, I called her Baji. Elder being defined as: anyone born before you were born. Growing up in Pakistan, I never addressed an elder by their name. So why is she calling me Baji? She is the product of the culture her parents brought with them when they migrated from the subcontinent.

In fact, the first time we met was this week, and that too in virtual space for the podcast recording. But don’t stop reading.īaji is an Urdu word for ‘elder sister.’ You know what Urdu is, right? If not, ask Ms. If you or your parents are from the subcontinent-India/Pakistan/Bangladesh-you know exactly what I am talking about. So why can’t she call me by my name? Why add Baji? I happen to be in my late sixties-very late sixties. Uzma and Zaiba had me as a guest on their podcast ‘ Mommying While Muslim.’ “I cannot address you as Sabeeha or my lips will burn.”

Threading my prayer rug by sabeeha rehman